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Consider the Horses Hoof (Part 3)

To the tune of If I were a Rich Man
Co-written with Wastingmythyme


[RUSH]

"Dear God, you made many, many Liberals.
There is of course, a great shame in being a Liberal.
Nor is a great honor either
Thank god I am Conservative, White and Rich.

If I were a Liberal,
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
All day long I'd love to be a bum
If I were a Liberal man.

They never want to work hard.
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
If I were a biddy biddy Liberal,
Yidle-diddle-didle-didle man.

Living in a ghetto, with rooms shared by dozens,
Right in the middle of slum town.
A leaky roof with holes in the floors below.
Getting stuck in elevator movin' on up,
And mugged on the stairs coming down,
and always having pockets with no dough

I'd give spare change to the poor, the disabled, and vets,
Just for the world to know I care.
(Insert)Pandering cause they don’t want to really work (End Insert)
With each loud "please" "just a dime" "i need food" "i am sick"
I’d watch them waste it all on beer,
Then someone says "There goes a stupid Jerk."

If I were a Liberal
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
All day long I'd pity pity them
If I were a Liberal man.
They never seem to work hard.
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
If I were a biddy biddy Liberal,
Yidle-diddle-didle-didle man.


I see my wife, that is Liberal,She kept her own name,
just like a Liberal man's wife would
Protesting the strife all around the land
She has her nose in the air, talking to socialists
Making sure the good guys at last win
Riling up the neighbors, such a fright.

The most important thing we need is to create new jobs
They will ask me to please help them
Like Obama the wise..'
If you please Mr. Liberal
Pardon Me, Mr Liberal
Posing issues that would cross O'Reilly's eyes

And it won't make one bit of difference if I answer right or wrong.
When you're Liberal, they think you really know!

If I were Liberal, I'd have spent my youth with back packs
Seeing Europe in it's decay.
Ignore that Reagan took down the Berlin Wall
And I'd discuss the Mao’s redbook with the Commies many hours every day.
That would be the strangest thing of all.

If I were a Liberal man,
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
All day long I'd plant the pretty mums
If I were a Liberal man.
I wouldn't ever work hard.
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.

Lord who said that Jews cannot eat ham,
You gave me the greatness that I am.
Leftist try to spoil my eternal plan.
I’m glad I’m not a Liberal man.

Comments

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
wastingmythyme
Apr. 17th, 2009 08:15 pm (UTC)
You and your collaborator does wonderful work. BRAVO
growingoldest
Apr. 18th, 2009 12:10 pm (UTC)
Give me Dukakis in a tank, Lee Atwater in a grave, Al Franken on a stick, Ann Coulter in hot water, John Kerry on a pedestal, Karl Rove in a septic tank. I'm LiberaL with a capital double L. And employed!

Good one
jellomarx
Apr. 18th, 2009 12:27 pm (UTC)
That was part 3. More to come.
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )

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