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Aging not so Gracefully


I am on a diet. I hate dieting, but I long to be able to stand and see my enormous feet at the same time.

Mind you, I'm not what someone first meeting me would call obese. I'm a big man. Is it because as Harry Chapin said, "I've got a tire around my gut from sitting on my butt?" Partially so.

My problem is snacking. The only god that I seriously worship is named Nabisco. I never met a cookie that I didn't like. GIVE ME A MALLOMAR OR GIVE ME DEATH!

I also am follicly challenged. I'm not bald. I'm just thinning (Unfortunately in the wrong place). Hair still grows, but mostly on my back and my neck. Maybe I should try a comb over from the back of my neck. Maybe I should shave off the rest of it. No, white men look ridiculous with shaved heads.

Aging, do we ever look as good as we did when we were young?

It occurs to me these are surmountable problems. I can lose weight by avoiding the cookies. Who cares about the hair? I'm relatively healthy (could be much healthier without the gut). I'm just getting older. It's far better than the alternative.



( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 27th, 2007 05:03 pm (UTC)
too much time
I must admit that I am impressed by the writing talents of Jello. You come across as a thoughtful, insightful, passionate individual! Are you paying someone to write for you? I am also intrigued by the concept of the combover starting at the back of your neck. It begs the question, "would your hair flap while you were running?", which I guess begs the further question, "Were you really running?". Anyway, not nearly the talent of writing as you, but a response to the blog nonetheless.
Nov. 27th, 2007 05:56 pm (UTC)
Re: too much time
does Anything flap anymore?
Nov. 27th, 2007 10:28 pm (UTC)
Re: too much time
In order to flap an object must be limp and soft. So you tell me, does it flap or not?
Nov. 28th, 2007 01:10 pm (UTC)
Re: too much time
I've thought that I would keep this G rated, but alas, I must settle for PG-13.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )



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