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Imagine what is occuring in Heaven today. When these two giants finally meet.

There’s a rap upon the door leading to the pearly gates.


“Come in, Come in, we’ve been waiting for you.”  Said the little bearded man sitting in a beach chair.   “Would you believe this 40 years walking through the desert, and they give me a beach chair and an umbrella as a gift.   I could have used them a few thousand years ago!”


“I was told to check in here.”  Said the very tall, distinguished man with a resounding voice. “I am…”


“I know who you are.”  Interrupted the little man.  “I requested that you be sent to me.   I owe you a lot.  What you have done for my reputation.”


“You mean you’re….”


“Did you expect to meet Michelangelo?  Delivering the Ten Commandments give me first choice when we have a new resident.  You should be honored. The last person that I asked to meet was Jesus.


“I thought that you’d be taller.”


“Ever since you made that movie, everybody has been saying that.   They grew them pretty small in my day.  It’s been 3000 years of evolution since I was alive.  My God, Goliath was only five foot six and we considered him a giant.  Remember I also lived 120 years.  I shrunk a little.”


“But, C.B. said that you were huge.”


“And, I appreciate that.  Before that movie, I was a forgotten man around here.   But know,   I’m something special again.   Do you know that I’m the second most popular attraction at the Heavenly Autograph convention?”


“Who’s first?”


“Mickey Mantle!  In Heaven as it was on earth.’


‘It does sometimes get tedious though.  I’m always being asked to perform miracles. Divide a River here, talk to a burning bush there, beat the Russian Hockey Team at the Olympics.   I’ve got to tell you that one was fun.  Also if one more person asks me to “Let my people go,” I think that I’ll divide him!’


‘It’s now time for you to meet some of the others.  We’ll talk again later.  Let me give you one piece of advise, don’t ever go to the Heaven Zoo.”


“Why not?”


“The Monkeys don’t have the same appreciation of your work that I do!”






( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 6th, 2008 10:23 pm (UTC)
I always knew that God loved guns...
Apr. 6th, 2008 10:27 pm (UTC)
I purposly avoided that angle. I think the last weapon God liked was the slingshot.
Apr. 11th, 2008 11:48 pm (UTC)
Sorry, just reading your other entries a little more. You really have a knack for writing, particularly humor (ain't so easy, is it?) and satire. Misc.:
beat the Russian Hockey Team at the Olympics
I'm just old enough to remember this and I may still have that victorious cover on *Sports Illustrated somewhere (it should be with a Sports Illustrated with a red-garbed Eric Heiden from the same Olympics, wearing his five gold medals around his neck).
Apr. 12th, 2008 12:03 am (UTC)
I love humorous writing. I grew up on Philip Roth, Kurt Vonnegut, Woody Allen and of course Groucho. My writing is a poor copy of theirs at best. Your kind words are greatly appreciated.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )



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