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2008 Summer Olympics

The 2008 Beijing Summer Olympics already beset with controversy, today took on a bizarre twist.   It was revealed that a number of new sports, which the Chinese have secretly been perfecting, were approved as events in the Summer Olympics.

Among these sports is the golf ball swallowing contest.   This is an individual and synchronized  pairs sport.   The Chinese received a luke warm support from the Israeli team, who asked if instead of golf balls they could swallow Matzoh Balls.  The plan is being considered.


Chinese golf ball swallower Muhammad Chang

Another of the controversial sports is the WC headstand.   This was approved as a women's only event.  Judges will score on a scale of 1-6.   The controversy seems to arise in many countries that have been unable to muster enough athletes for the event,  France, for instance, long known for its problems regarding public toilets could only get athletes if the French Olympic committee would move the training site to Germany, long known for its clean toilets.   
                                     
German star wc headstand athlete Gertrude Schmidt

The final controversial event is the flatulence fire.   This not surprisingly got full support of the American Male Athletes,  many of whom claim that they've been training for this their whole life.

American star Duke F. Artman.

 

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jellomarx

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